I remember my high school friend asking me “Hamza… Don’t you want a girlfriend?”

He had started dating, along with a bunch of my friends, and I was the slow boomer. They hit puberty before me and started getting girls whilst I was still focused on playing video games and thinking girls were some weird creature I didn’t know how to talk to.

Fast forward some years and I’m horny as hell trying to attract girls on Tinder and Instagram.

And it was difficult.

I would be getting 1, and sometimes 0 matches on Tinder per day. When I did get a match, the excitement stopped after I had already been ghosted so many times.

Why was it so hard to stand out? My pictures were pretty good, I was sure of it.

And I was a catch right? I was nice, I would take an interest in them and ask them about their hobbies…

But still nothing. I would go weeks and months without a single girl attracted to me.

And when there was a girl who seemed somewhat interested in me, by replying to my messages and sometimes even coming on a date with me, she would just lose interest and ask if we could be friends instead!

I searched online for advice on how to get girls and none of it helped me.

All the advice online was already the stuff I was doing – Be nice, take an interest, speak about your hobbies, ask her questions…

Something was missing.

And worst of all, my friends who were naturally good with girls would make fun of me for struggling and researching this.

But it didn’t seem odd to me – Attracting a girl, experiencing love and a relationship felt so important to me so of course I was gonna put extra intention to learn how to attract girls.

That was when my brother forced me to get into the gym…

I remember going for my first few sessions and it was so painful that I didn’t want to go back again.

I would rather just play Runescape and watch youtube videos…

Then I started watching guys who had 10/10 aesthetic body’s on YouTube, and they were always getting girls!

I saw guys who looked like me build muscle and become so confident and it clicked instantly for me:

I spent every single day watching videos on fitness, and I got more and more into lifting weights and building my dream body.

I researched online on how to build an aesthetic body that attracts girls and guess what?

Everyone called me shallow! All the guys online were only interested in weightlifting to build more strength… so that they could lift more weight.

Weightlifting is fun but honestly bro, I just wanted girls to like me.

People called it shallow but I thought attracting love and a relationship into my life was anything but shallow.

It was all about prioritising the 6 aesthetic muscles:

Neck, Upper Traps, Lateral Delts, Upper Chest, Lats, Abs

AND THEN making sure that you optimised your training to actually build muscle instead of just strength, which most workout routines focused on instead.

And finally I finished the framework with the most important aspect of building muscle: Prioritising ‘bulking’ for the first 2 years of your training.